new, again

With any sort of luck, this will be my last post about starting a new job.

Wednesday was my first day - just new teacher training, really - at my new school, South Shore Charter Public School. SSCPS is a K-12 school, the first charter school in Mass, I'm told. It was founded with a focus on community service, multiple-intelligence learning, and the belief that school is not just preparatory, that kids need to know that what they are doing now has real value. There's a lot of parent and community involvement, small classes, student-led workshops, and a nice blend of informality and respect. I'm very very happy to be coming back to teaching in a place like this, rather than a more traditional high school. (I'm also happy to have passed the MTELs and gotten my Mass certification, so I can come back to teaching period!)

Of course, with any new job, there are plenty of sources for nervousness. I'll be teaching chemistry for the first time, and while I'm pretty confident with the material itself, running chem labs scares me a little. Also, I was originally going to be joining a science teacher who had been there a few years (Yes, the whole science department consists of two people!), but she has decided to move to be closer to her family. So it'll be me and one other brand-new girl, although we do have an excellent mentor who will be coming in once a week to help us out. An aside, though - how cool is it that the whole science department (including the teacher for the middle grades, too) is young(ish) and female?

It's funny, but the whole way I ended up with this job seems sort of . . . serendipitous (really looking for a less cheesy word here, but coming up blank). I have no recollection of applying for it, though I'm sure I did - I sent out a LOT of resumes. (My process was, essentially, to look for places in Mass that were hiring, check Google Maps to see how long it would take me to get there, and if it was an hour or less, apply.) I was sent an email on a Friday saying they would be interviewing for a week, to leave a message over the weekend, and they would call on the Monday to set up a time. Only, I didn't get the email until Monday. I almost just let it go, figuring it was too late, but I decided to call and managed to schedule an interview for the Tuesday. It was a group interview - a few teachers from the school, the 7-12 principal, a parent, and a student - which I was totally not expecting, and I left thinking I had blown it. Thankfully, I was wrong, and everything happened quickly after that. I had all my paperwork in front of me and had given my notice at Sylvan by the end of the week.

So, here I go again, into something new. I know it's going to be a big change for the whole family. We'll have the "typical" everybody-gets-home-around-five structure, which hasn't been the case for a long time. Jane, in particular, has never gone anywhere full-time like that, though she's quite comfortable at the daycare she's at now. The teachers there have known her for a couple of years now, and have known us since Reese was three, so I'm comfortable with that too. Reese is still at the elementary school, also with a teacher who knows us well (she's been telling him she couldn't wait until he got to fourth grade for a few years now!). What makes me the most nervous is Sam - I wish I could be around more for his first year in junior high. Not that we won't have any time to talk, and for me to stay on top of what's going on with him, but I know it's going to be a lot to keep up with. I suspect my knitting will suffer . . . not to mention blogging . . .

I'll keep you posted, though - if for no other reason than a need to vent!

the only constant is change

I started blogging about the same time I started the process of going back to work after Jane was born. While this wasn't intentional, it probably wasn't quite a coincidence either. It's not an easy process - especially when you, frankly, don't want to do it - and the chronicling of it has been a help.

For those keeping track, I have had three different jobs in 2.5 years of blogging. I taught a couple of physics classes at Moses Brown (a fantastic place, btw, I'll totally send the kids there when I become independently wealthy), I taught some SAT prep classes for Kaplan, and I've worked here at Sylvan, first full-time, then dialing it back to part-time. And now, I'm looking again.

No, I haven't lost my job or anything, but it turns out that working part-time here just isn't enough. I could switch back to full-time, no problem, but that was the evening schedule that did not let me have enough time with the family - not an option.

I've been sort-of looking for a little while, at lab-based jobs or something like that, but I had been shying away from the idea of going back to the classroom full-time. For one thing, my RI certification has expired, and getting it back would require taking some courses, and I can't really do that right now. But also, the last year I taught high school was very hard. And I know, intellectually at least, that there were other things going on at that time that are resolved now, but that really does little to make the idea less scary. I started thinking about it, though, when J (casually - he's a wonderful husband; he doesn't push) showed me an ad for a local Catholic high school looking for a physics teacher.

And I applied. They turned me down because I am not affiliated with a church. As an aside - WTF?? Not to paint all religious school with a common brush or anything, but seriously? My lack of professional certification is a-okay, but my lack of religion - that's a dealbreaker. And they wonder why they are rapidly losing enrollment. All right, rant over.

That seemed to break the stalemate, if you will, and I started looking into it. I found that I can get certified in MA by passing the MTEL exams, since I had already held certification elsewhere. I signed up for those - I'll be taking them in July - and I started sending out resumes.

So far I've heard back from a couple of schools, and I had an interview last week. My timing, as it turns out, sucks. I started looking into this just in time to miss the April job fairs, and I won't get my MTEL results (and hopefully certification) until August. The interview on Friday went really well, and she said she'd like to hire me, but nothing can go forward until I have certification. She is looking to fill four science jobs, though (which is not easy - luckily for me), so she told me to let her know as soon as I get my results. Good news, I guess, but also an ominous harbinger of things to come. I expect a nervous summer capped by a busy August.

And in September, maybe a whole new adventure.

update

I can't do a big post right now - I've been officially sucked into the holiday craft and decoration vortex - but I wanted to let you know how everything turned out.

I sucked it up and talked to my boss, and as predicted, he was totally nice about the whole thing. He said he understood about needing to be with my family more, he had no problem with me changing my schedule, and he was just sad because he'd be losing one of his best tutors. Take that, mean-boss stereotype!

So starting next week, I'll be leaving work in time to pick up the kids from school on Mondays and Wednesdays, with Tuesdays and Thursdays to be added ASAP, as soon as he can find a replacement.

The relief is completely awesome. And thanks so much to those who wrote lovely supporting comments - I just love the internet.

time to make some changes

In which I ramble, stream-of-consciousness style. Sorry about that.

In the nearly two years since I've been writing this blog, I've had three different jobs. Four, maybe; I'm not sure if I've done any in-home tutoring in that time. I suspect I have. Regardless, that's a lot of instability. A lot of indecision, and thinking about what exactly do I want to be doing, anyway?? I know the answer to that question. I want to be home, with the kids. Keeping things in order, feeding the family healthfully, sneaking in some knitting when the boys are at school and Baby Sister's napping peacefully.



Because that's how it be.



Anyway, neither this fantasy stay-at-home situation nor the more realistic and chaotic version is possible. We're not going to be a one-income family anytime soon and I'm going to have to get over it. Do I sound bitter? Well. Yes.



I've mentioned I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. It's become clear that the job I'm in is not going to work out for too much longer, for a variety of reasons. The lack of benefits in this day and age is completely unrealistic. And more importantly, this family cannot deal with this schedule anymore. There are days when the only time I see the boys is during the hour or so that we're all getting ready in the morning. This is not nearly enough time, obviously. And that hour is not exactly quality time, as anybody who has hustled children through their breakfasts and out the door in the morning knows. Everything was kind of illuminated for me (if that's not too strong a phrase) last week, when I discovered that Big Brother is in danger of failing reading for the first trimester.



Everybody reading this who knows Big Brother just had to read that sentence twice. I know, people. This kid is an enthusiastic and adventurous reader. He started the Harry Potter books - read, I think the first three of them - the summer before second grade. And this was after he had already skipped a grade! He was freaking six! But this year, he's not keeping up with his work. He's a procrastinator, just like his mom, and he needs support. Not somebody to do his work for him, or nag him, but just some help staying on top of things. And while I love my husband dearly, he may not be the best person for this job. He is the most motivated and disciplined person I have ever met (sometimes I wonder how he lives with me), and he doesn't always understand that not everybody is like him. And I can't sit at work, helping other kids stay on top of their stuff, while my own child struggles at home, and not think, This is pretty fucked up.



So. The obvious solution would be go back to a regular teaching job. Full benefits, out of work by three or so, problem solved. Except at this point I'd have to go back and get some more college credits first, as my certification's expired. Also, I've done the classroom teaching thing, and I don't think it's right for me. At least, not right now. It frankly requires more energy than I am willing to put into anything other than my family at the moment. I look at some of the really good teachers I know, especially those with kids (like my sister-in-law - that motivation/discipline thing must run in the family), and I think they may actually be superhuman. It's just a theory I have.


Where was I? Right. Jobs. I did end up taking the GRE's. All the indecision and inaction was making me antsy, I think, and that was at least something I could do. Whether or not it was a useless exercise remains to be seen. I did pretty well, but I certainly don't have time to go to grad school anytime soon. When I was first feeling sort of panicky about the whole economic situation, a degree in a field such as engineering (which would reasonably fit in with the degree I already have) seemed like a pretty good idea. Now that I've got a whole new situation to feel panicky about, that idea is pretty well gone. No regrets though - I don't think I would have been happy doing it at all.


So the immediate plan is this: I'm going to talk to my boss (a very kind and understanding person, so WHY AM I SO TERRIFIED) about cutting back my hours so I can be there to pick up the boys from school. The downside is that it would make my job entirely administrative, no more teaching, and I'd miss the kids. But I miss my kids more. If that's not an option, I'll have to start looking again. Probably more in the science field and less in the education field, and definitely with hours that will fit my family. If I have to, I'll look for a part-time retail something or other. If those kinds of jobs are around right now.


So. Thanks for listening, and wish me luck.

odds & ends

Man, do I love the inventor of bullets. Well, not, you know, bang-bang bullets; I'm referring to the pseudo-organizational tool I employ way more than I ought to. And here I go again!

• Fall has arrived! Hurrah! This just makes me so happy. The cooler weather is mostly here, and the leaves are starting to turn. It's lovely. Expect to see leaf pictures around here soon; I know I will not be able to help myself.
• The cooler weather has brought with it the return of my morning walk with Baby Sister. We frequent the local bike path, which this year has been christened "Treewater." I was reluctant to use the word bike with Baby Sister, as her biking skills are not really ready for anyplace but the driveway, so I described it to her as, "you know, the place with the trees, and the water," as enticingly as I could. Hence Treewater. I like it, I think I should mention it to whomever runs the park. It's much more poetic and succint than the "Ten Mile River Greenway." Don't you agree?
• Said morning walk has been touch and go. Baby Sister is not always enthusiastic about riding in her stroller. If she would prefer to walk, I'd be pretty much okay with that, but she'd prefer to push the stroller. Or climb and stand in the stroller. These things tend to slow us down, and for a couple of weeks the morning walks were routinely ending in tears. (Hers, I swear.) It's been better for the past few days, and I hope that continues. I'm becoming increasingly aware that this hour of relative quiet and physical activity is a big contributor to my sanity.
• This is largely because work has been pretty crazy. See, my boss and his wife own five Sylvan centers, and the director of one of those centers is no longer working for them. Which means that two or three days a week, my boss is working at the other center and I'm all by myself here for about half the workday, until students start coming in. Most of the time there's some work to be done, but I've got a lot of downtime. It's also just weird to be completely alone for such big chunks of time. Now if I were at home and completely alone for a big chunk of time, I would love it, but it's just not the same here. I've done a lot of blog reading, not so much posting (except for, you know, now), and very very little knitting. I'm paranoid that somebody will walk in looking for help for their child and I'll be sitting there with my sock yarn. I'm thinking that would be somewhat unprofessional. At least the computer makes it look like I'm doing something work-related.
• I've also been doing some online GRE prep, and I'm thinking I'm going to register to take the test soon. What I will do after that is less certain. I like my job a lot, but I don't see my kids nearly enough. Also there are no benefits whatsoever. I don't need healthcare, J's job is actually really good for that, but some sort of retirement something would probably be good. I know very very little about this kind of thing, but the news lately has just freaked me right out. It's very frustrating to regularly hear and read about this stuff that I understand just enough to get that it is Very Bad. Add the lack of any retirement benefits in my job and it gets all the more anxiety-producing.
• I have to add, I hate the fact that I'm considering a career change for monetary reasons. Everybody knows you don't go into teaching for the money; it was never supposed to be about money. I love teaching. I especially love the way I teach now - all sorts of subjects to all sorts of kids, one-on-one where you make such a great connection. It's so gratifying to hear from kids and parents how much we've helped them, and in this job I hear it all the time. It's awesome, with the one exception of that gnawing ache of missing my family. This reality-rearing-its-ugly-head thing sucks.
• And because all that would be a crappy way to end, I'll talk about knitting! I've cranked out a couple of small projects in the past two weeks, but I plan to post the pattern for those, so they'll have to wait. They're cute, though. :) I also cast on a bigger project, a cobblestone for Big Brother. I've got this crazy idea that I'd like all the kids to get sweaters for Christmas. You can look forward to the slow but steady unraveling of that idea (no pun intended) over the next few months; it should be fun. I sized the pattern down to fit his measurements, which wasn't too tough, and I've got just a little of it done at this point. He also requested a "zip-up," which is a little scary, but I've got quite a while before I have to face the zipper part. Amy has steered me toward a tutorial, so hopefully it will all be okay. The other thing that might make this sweater tough is the color - Big Brother picked out solid black. So far it hasn't been as difficult to see as I thought it would, and the yarn - di.Ve Zenith, which is a wonderfully squishy superwash merino - is nice to work with. A bit splitty, but I'm using some very pointy Knitpicks circulars so I haven't had much trouble.

Well, I think that's about it for now. I plan on posting that pattern later this week. No, really. See you then.

synopsis...

...of what I've doing in the past month (!!) that I have been neglecting the blog.

• Work work work work. Sadly, that nearly sums it up. The end of the school year/beginning of summer apparently comes in two waves: first the ohmygodI'mgoingtofailifIdon'tgetagoodgradeonmyexam!!! wave, largely high-schoolers. One day in the last week of school I did the same chemistry review sheet for four straight hours, with one kid after another. I thought my brain was going to leak out my ears. The second wave is the kids who want to catch up over the summer, or at least not forget everything they learned. Well, that's what their parents want, anyway. Not that they give us a hard time or anything, though - seriously, kids in a classroom and kids one-on-one are completely different creatures. It's amazing. Things seem to have settled a bit for now, though, thankfully.

• We played in the sprinkler.

• We had a summer storm.




• We went camping!

We went up to New Hampshire and camped in the Bear Brook State Park for a long weekend, so J and the boys, plus J's sister and her husband, could go to the NASCAR race in Loudon. It was a good trip - a bit rainy at first, but nice anyway. We got to try out the new pop-up trailer we got in the spring after finally admitting we had outgrown the 29-year-old one we inherited from J's parents. It was a little sad to see it go, but the new(er) one is so much bigger - it was awesome. I'm looking forward to going again in a few weeks. Our camping trips are full of traditions, both universal and more unique to our family. There are, of course, campfires, s'mores, and just enjoying the outdoors (Burma Shave!). And there's also cribbage,

catching bugs,

and a day spent being all touristy. This time it was a trip to Weir's Beach, outside Laconia, where we took a train ride and dipped our toes in Lake Winnipesaukee.

• What would a vacation be without a trip to a local yarn store? The day everybody was at the race Baby Sister and I, Google directions in hand, attempted to scope out a few places. Unfortunately, my Google directions mostly took me to yarn stores that did not actually exist, and the one I did find was closed (Sunday, duh). My last-minute crappy research performs fabulously again! But we did get some great pizza and a little one-on-one time, and when we headed out on Tuesday we stopped at the yarn store on the way out. It was the Elegant Ewe in Concord, and I wish I could have spent more time there. I didn't actually buy any yarn, but I did pick up some nice fiber: blue/brown/yellow/green merino pencil roving, which I had never tried before, and some nice gray alpaca from a local farm. Both of which have been spun up already:

Lately I've been gravitating more to the spinning wheel than the knitting needles. I also spun this, from some batts I purchased on etsy:

Plans for all this yarn? I don't have any yet, really. Probably mittens, except for the super-chunky yarn from the pencil roving. I think there's only enough of that for a baby hat or something. Good thing I know of some impending babies. :)

Well, I think that's about all I've got for now. I wish I hadn't been so busy, because I know there are things I meant to write and didn't, and certainly things I meant to comment on elsewhere. How do some people balance this family/work/hobbies thing so elegantly and efficiently? Mind-boggling, I tell you.

a new me?

So it's been about six weeks or so that I've been in the new job, and I feel like I've kind of settled in. I did the important things like cleaning out all the crap in the desk (Hours of operation for fall of 2006? Hello?) and putting a picture of my adorable family on top of it (the same picture that's in the sidebar, actually). I pretty much know how to use the different computer programs. I've met all of the students here, and taught quite a few of them.

I'm really liking this job, which is funny, because it's kind of exactly what I thought I didn't want after I left teaching high school. I hated, hated the fact that when I left work, I wasn't done with work. There was always planning, correcting, etc. to do, and it's just a fact that teachers do a lot of their work at home. (Which is one reason why it kind of drives me crazy when people try to say that teachers aren't actually grossly underpaid, when you look at the hours per year that they work, and summers off, and blah, blah, blah . . . but I digress.) After doing that, and trying to keep both the family and my sanity intact at the same time, not to mention that's when I was trying so hard and wanting so much to get pregnant, and goodness, I'm getting carried away here. What was I saying? Right, I wanted a job where the work would take place entirely at work. Actually, I told myself I wanted a job with the least amount of responsibility I could get away with. I was thinking salesperson, office-filing-type person, something I didn't have to think too hard about. And my job is totally not that. The important part worked out - my work does take place entirely at work. But I actually have a lot of responsibility. I'm planning kids' programs, setting up their testing, checking their books to make sure everything's going the way it's supposed to, doing the scheduling, I even have teachers who, for lack of a better word, report to me. And go figure, I really like it. I guess I didn't want something where I didn't have to think, just something where I could think about work when I'm at work, and home when I'm at home. Not that I don't think about home when I'm at work, but you know what I mean.

Anyway, my original intent with this post was to talk about the changes I've noticed since I've been back at work. Because it is a big difference, and I know pretty much every parent confronts the work/don't work dilemma in some way, at some time. I've pretty much run the gamut of the situation; I've been a full-time mom, a full-time working person, a part-time working person, a full-time student, a part-time student, all since my kids were born. So I figure I can share, well, not my wisdom (stop laughing!), but at least my observations of how I've felt these past six weeks.

• I miss my kids and my husband. Of course. Even when you know they're in good hands, and I do, it's not easy.
• I'm more emotional. This may have something to do with crazy-ass hormone levels at the moment, but I'm not sure. The other day, I was listening to a story on This American Life, and I cried like a baby in the car. The really telling part - it was a repeat of a story I had already heard, and though it was certainly quite sad the first time, it did not have that effect on me.
• I have to really pay attention to keeping up with other things in my life that are important to me. Like knitting, and spinning, and the blog. I don't have as much time, but I do think they're worth it. Frankly, I have to be more than just a mom and a teacher, as important as those jobs are.
• My house is . . . well. I'm sure you can imagine. J does a great job, he cooks awesome dinners and does all the dishes (Yes! My most hated chore!) but it's a lot. My kitchen floor? I don't even want to think about it.

Maybe I am a new me. Probably every time somebody does something new and different they become a new them. ("New them"? Does that make sense?) I know I'm still finding my way through a lot of this, but I think it will be all right. We'll see what the kids say about it all in a few years . . . you know, in therapy.

hello again!

Wow, you're still here!

Well, it's been a trying week, but look what J did!

before (aah! scary!)

after

As Stacie noted in the comments, that guy's a keeper.

It is so weird to go from posting every day to being unable to post for over a week. What the heck should I write about? I couldn't possibly mention all the things that struck me as "blogworthy" during the week, even if I could remember them; it would just be ridiculous. There's new knitting and spinning, but I think that can be its own post. I guess I should just write about the biggest stuff this week: the new job and the weather.

We got a big fat winter storm or two this week - about a foot of snow on Thursday and another six inches or so on Sunday. The kids were totally excited - and when I say "the kids," I'm including myself. :)

Here's the view from the window Thursday night:


And some Friday morning shots:

The kids got the day off Friday (as did I) so the boys had a lot of fun playing outside. Baby Sister did not really care for playing in the snow, which I guess is understandable when it comes up to your thighs. So I did not get to spend any time in the snow with the boys. Luckily, our backyard has a good-sized hill, so they can sled even if I can't actually take them anywhere. Mostly, though, it's all about the snowballs. I love this picture of Big Brother really putting his heart into his throw:





I was especially glad for the snowed-in time this weekend after going back to work last Tuesday. It's hard to be away from your kids, even when you know they are in more than capable hands. Especially when you know they are sometimes giving those very capable hands a hard time. . . (I feel I should note: Jess put them up to that.)

The good news is that I do like the new job. It's a little overwhelming at present - these Sylvan people have their own language, I swear - but I think with time it will get easier. Once I understand all the different programs we teach and learn the myriad of acronyms I will hopefully stop coming home at night feeling like I'm brimming with information and if I'm not careful it will spill out my ears. And I must say that as I've been going back and forth between different centers on different days to train, I have yet to meet an unpleasant person. So it's all good. Except for missing the kids, of course.

disaster strikes!

Oh, yes, there was disaster yesterday. But before that (and after that, actually) there was good stuff. So I'll talk about that first.

In the morning Jess, my mom, and I drove to Fairhaven for a Ravelry brunch at Eva's Yarn Shop. You read that right - a Ravelry brunch. The owner, Eva, opened her doors a couple hours early, discounted pretty much everything for that period of time, and invited the Ravelry mob to come on by, and bring some food. It was such a great thing for her to do, and evidently I'm not the only one who thought so, because the place was packed! I'm sure pictures will be popping up on other blogs soon. The blogs of smart people who remembered to bring cameras.

The store itself was spacious and beautiful and full of yummy yummy yarns. I did not go crazy this close to Christmas, but I did get some Sheep Shop Sheep One in the poetically named G129 colorway. I can't show it to you, but more on that later. I will definitely be going back to this place soon - I'm adding it to my mental list of post-holiday yarn shopping destinations.

I got home from this lovely outing to find my computer eviscerated on the kitchen table. This, of course, would be the aforementioned disaster. J did his diagnostic poking around, which he thankfully does have some talent for, and he thinks it just needs a new power supply. Which he has already ordered. And maybe it is a sad commentary on my life how much suffering the lack of this computer is causing, but that doesn't so much make the suffering go away. Our older computer was upstairs in the boys' room, for them to play solitaire and write little stories, so we brought that down and hooked it up. At this point I have the internet, s-l-o-w-l-y, but I do not have email. I opened the email program on the old computer and found some well-aged spam but no inclination to get any post-2004 messages. Most troubling, though, is the fact that all my pictures are on that computer. Yes, yes, I should have backed them up. I know that, I knew that, but it doesn't do me any good now. So I can't show you any pretty yarn, or my pretty Christmas tree, or the gloves I finished yesterday, or my adorable children, or . . . well, you get the picture. (Actually, you don't. Ha! Puns at my own expense!)

So hopefully the computer will be back to normal soon. And to take my mind off it, perhaps, I got some good news yesterday: I got a new job! I had interviewed for a Director of Education position at a local Sylvan center last week, and they liked me! The best part about these interviews, though, was this neat little personality test thing they have you do. It consists of a few lists of items or statements, and you put them in order from best to worst. The whole thing took about ten minutes, but they got so much information from it. When they went over the results with me, I couldn't believe how accurate it was. Like, bordering on creepy kind of accurate. It even said that I am not all that great at presenting myself and touting my accomplishments, so they should take this into consideration when evaluating the interview. How great is it, to go into an interview with that kind of disclaimer?
So . . . yeah. Working full-time again. The simple fact is that I really need to. There was only going to be so long that we could get away with being a one-income household, and the time has pretty much run out. Which sucks, because I would prefer to be home with the kids, but I guess I don't really want to whine too much about something so out of my control. Out loud, anyway. I think I will like the job (that test did say I was an optimist), even if I don't like being away from my babies. And I'm sure I will have more to say about it once it gets going.

The other good thing from yesterday? Brand-new Niece is home! We got to bring the kids to see her (the hospital wouldn't let them) and it was so sweet. Baby Sister was a little apprehensive at first, probably because a newborn doesn't really look like what she pictures as a "baby," but once she figured out what it was she was very excited. "Baby! Baby! Baby hand! Baby nose! Baby head!" I love that there's another little girl so close to her age in the family. The boys both got to hold her (they are baby experts, you know) and declared that she looks like Baby Sister. Probably because she's, you know, a baby. I used the word "baby" ten times in that last paragraph. Sorry about that.

And I'm also sorry for such a long, picture-free post, but I wanted to get everything in so I don't feel like there's things I missed, and I should post about them while they are still fresh. Because I don't think you'll hear from me again until the computer's fixed - I am not loving the slow internet and the Windows Millenium Edition. Send me some good technology mojo, will you? :)

misconceptions about high school

So did you think that the "cool kids" didn't take SAT prep classes? Wrong!

Did you also think that at the end of the day, high school students would generally want to go the hell home? Nope! Wrong again!

I'm teaching one of my classes at a local high school, and the room they put me in is proving to be not exactly ideal. See, it's the first room on a corridor off the main corridor, and the last room on the main corridor is the cafeteria. So, if you look out the windows of the room I'm in, you are looking into the windows of the cafeteria. Which is apparently often full of kids who like to make faces at the kids in my class. And what can I do? I don't actually work at the school, I have no authority. I can at least stop them sending text messages to kids in my class, or at least stop them from getting answered. Teenagers, I swear. My kids will never be teenagers - can I do that? Oh, and did I mention this class is from 6 - 8:30pm? Why on earth are these kids still at school?? WTF??

It is, to put it mildly, a distraction during class. Which is fitting, because "distracted" could sum up my current state of mind pretty well. I can't seem to focus on anything lately. I read a book or two to Baby Sister, then I fold half a load of laundry, then I remember an errand I needed to run, then I put her down for a nap, then I do some dishes, then somehow I'm online researching spinning wheels. (Yeah, I've been sucked down that rabbit hole, but more on that another day.) Maybe I need more sleep. Actually, I'm almost positive I don't get enough sleep, but I really hate to give up my after-everybody's-in-bed knitting time. It's a matter of which would make me more crazy - lack of sleep or lack of "me time"?

On Sunday I managed to put aside the scattered feeling for a little while and go to Slater Mill's celebration of National Spinning and Weaving week. Actually, there was spinning, weaving, knitting, quilting, crochet, dyeing, and felting, from what I saw. Fiber heaven!

The only kid that wanted to come with me was Big Brother. (Mom, there's a NASCAR race! It's Talladega!!) He had a lot of fun, though. He helped dye a ginormous roving with some Kool-aid,

he sewed a bean bag with a lovely blanket-stitched edge,

and he made a felted coaster (no pictures of that, for some reason). We also got to see a huge reproduction spinning wheel. This guy made it look easy, but I'm sure it's not.

They're trying to set up a real fiber community at Slater Mill, and I hope there's a lot of interest. It's a pretty place, and it's just such a cool idea to be able to, say, take a spinning class at the first textile mill in the country. A reverse Industrial Revolution, maybe?

By the way, I edited that last post, about the k'nex swift, to include directions, if anybody's interested. :)

busy, busy, busy

Jayjay made a great observation on her blog the other day: that the year doesn't really go from January - December. Instead, as all academics (and, I would add, parents of schooolchildren) know, the year goes from August/September - May/June, depending on the school. And this end-of-the-year time has been nutty. I've spent the past week or so writing the exam, writing the reviews for the exam, making sure everything is graded so the kids can know their grade going into the exam (or, as one student asked me, "What's the minimum grade I need on the exam to pass this class?" Love that attitude.). Next week will be giving and correcting said exam, then figuring out how to get all this information into the computer system. I don't mean to complain too much, though; I've really enjoyed this semester and this school and it's going to be a bit sad that it's all over. In spite of the fact that I'd like to stay part-time while the baby is little, I almost wish the teacher I've been covering for had decided not to come back after her maternity leave. Ah well.

I have been meaning all week to write about the wool fair, even though it was a very small one, nothing like the big events I've read about in various places. It was held at small local farm/living history museum, where the people dress in the period clothing and all that. My mom, Old Friend, Baby Sister, and I drove down. Baby Sister fell asleep in the car, and we squinted at all the signs as we got close, not being particularly familiar with the area. When we saw one that said Sheep Shearing we literally all yelled in unison, "Sheep shearing!" and woke the baby up. Seriously, we are such dorks. But we had a good time, and there was, in fact, sheep shearing:

What I thought was most interesting was the people dyeing wool using old, completely natural methods. Look at all the colors they got from the local plants:

These yarns weren't for sale; the tags say what was used to dye them. There were, of course, items that were for sale. There was a lot of stuff for spinning as well as knitting, and actually, I didn't see anybody knitting, but I saw a lot of spinning. It really made me want to try it . . . maybe when the kids are a bit older and I have a little more free time . . . because I'm sure I'll have so much more free time when they're teenagers . . . sigh . . .

I didn't buy much, just the sock yarn I mentioned in the last post, and a spinning kit intended for kids. It contained a drop spindle made with a CD, and a bit of wool, which I don't really think had been processed all that much. It cost a $3 donation to the museum, so I said what the heck and picked up. I used it to make some incredible crappy yarn.

All in all, a pretty good day.

While I have been blog-absent, I got tagged for a meme! I am unreasonably excited about this, it being my very first. It's the "seven things about you meme" and I plan to do it very soon, as soon as I can find seven people to tag who have not yet done this (it seems like everybody has!) and who would have any idea who I am if I tagged them. Coming soon! Oh, and FO's coming soon too!

ready for my closeup

So on Monday, I arrived at the Kaplan center with my resume, test scores, head shots . . . okay, that's my last "audition" joke, I promise. Anyway, I was still kind of unsure about what topic I wanted to use for this five-minute "teacher audition," so I brought notes for three different ones, planning to choose on the fly based on what other people were doing. Shrewd, no?

I ended up talking not about anything knitting-related, but about another hobby of mine, letterboxing. I thought that I had sweated and stumbled through the whole thing (teaching an hour-long physics class is way easier than a five-minute presentation/audition, btw), but afterward a couple people told me that letterboxing sounded really fun, and on Wednesday I got an email accepting me into their teacher training program. So - yay! This is not exactly a high-paying job, but I think it will be more reliable than the in-home tutoring and it will enable me to stay part-time a bit longer. If I can do that until Baby Sister is in school, I will be very happy indeed.

And on a totally unrelated topic, take a look at this!

It's Big Brother's first knitting! I'm so proud!

what is this, American Freaking Idol?

I heart the internets for many obvious reasons, and one of them is craigslist. I used to spend way too much time there (before I discovered knitting and blogs) but now I just mainly peruse now and then. One thing I always check out is the job listings, whether I'm looking or not. The ones in the "etc." category are often amusing, but at the moment I really am looking so I've been checking the "education" category.

So I ended up filling out an application to teach SAT prep courses at Kaplan, and the first thing you need to do after you've applied is audition. Yup, I said audition. I have to teach a five-minute lesson on something, and it can't be academic. Hmmm . . . non-academic subject . . . something I'm interested in . . . yeah, I think it's going to be knitting-related. Of course, I can't actually bring in yarn and needles and teach people to knit in five minutes, so I'm not exactly sure how to approach this. Plus it needs to be, you know, not boring. (I don't mean to speak heresy here - of course we all know that knitting isn't boring.)

I immediately called my Radio Personality Sister, figuring she'd know a bit about being entertaining. Her suggestion was to focus on how knitting has its own language, maybe break down a pattern and explain it. Is that entertaining? I mean to a non-knitter? I'm open to any and all comments/suggestions!

whew

I don't think I have ever been quite so glad to see the end of a week as this one. The weather, viruses, and even the very circle of life conspired to keep me from knitting, from blogging, from keeping my sanity.

First the teacher for whom I have been covering had her baby. Yay! So now I am covering some of her husband's classes as well. This would be totally fine if he had left something for me to, say, do with his students. I mean, he had to know the baby thing was coming, right? I realize that the time just before the birth of your firstborn is not a period of particularly clear thinking, but still.

So when I heard the forecast of a big storm for Wednesday, I was pretty psyched. A snow day! Perfect timing! But no. Instead of powdery white goodness, there fell from the sky slushy wet crap that flash-froze when the sun went down, turning all the world (or at least, my little corner of the world) into a skating rink. And there was still school.

But wait, there's more! Since I last posted, the boys have been sick, I have been sick, J has been sick, Old Friend has been sick and Magic Baby has been sick. The boys got it first and were getting better just in time for me to start working a much longer schedule and the person who normally picks them up from school to catch the bug. Thank goodness for grandparents willing to jump in at a moment's notice. Several times in the same week.

So now it's Saturday, and in a word - whew.

There are some FO's to speak of, and I will get around to taking pictures and posting them ASAP.

first day

Today is the first day of the new job. I suppose I shouldn't be so nervous about a part-time, temporary job, but I am. I'm nervous for a variety of reasons. First, some history: I taught in a public high school in a semi-rural area for three years. I had a hard time; I was only teaching two sections of physics, which is what I went to school for, and three sections of 9th-grade earth science, which I found interesting but I hadn't had a class in earth science since I was in 8th grade. And as a new teacher, I had some fairly tough students. Again, this was a semi-rural area so it's not like there were gangs, or weapons, or things of that nature, but I'm a pretty small, quiet, laid-back sort of person, and I just didn't fare well with 300lb 16-year-olds who tell me they are just in school because their parents won't let them drop out. They quite frankly didn't give a shit about weather patterns, or oceans, or rocks. I have great admiration for those teachers who can inspire even the toughest kids, get into their lives, and show them things about themselves they didn't know were there. I just am not a teacher like that. I have things to offer - my physics classes were really fun and dynamic and the kids came back after taking college physics to show me their exams with A's on them, but I wasn't suited for what I was doing. The last year was especially tough. I was trying unsuccessfully to get pregnant, Little Brother was having difficulty with being in preschool all day, and nobody was really happy. So I left. I took a year and a half off, and I got to be there for my boys when they got out of school, especially Little Brother, who was then in a half-day kindergarten. Also, I was pregnant within one month after I wasn't working. I am a believer in the physical effects of stress!

So now Baby Sister is nearly ten months old, the boys are both in school all day, and this position to teach two physics classes a day at Fancy Private School for the remainder of this year, covering somebody else's maternity leave, kind of falls out of the sky. And it's too perfect to not take it, even though I'm not sure if I want to go back to work yet. After I left the other job, I actually wasn't sure I was suited to being a teacher at all. I always said my ideal position would be to be able to teach just what I went to school for, to kids who want to be there. And so - poof - here it is! It sort of feels like a do-over on a teaching career, a possible gateway into doing this in a way that I can feel like I'm really connecting with kids and teaching them something. Of course, there's also the feeling of if I can't do it this way, I really can't do this at all. So that's one reason it makes me nervous.

There's also the issue of leaving Baby Sister with somebody who isn't me or J. That's not a big worry, because she is going to be with Old Friend, whom I've known forever, who has a son Magic Boy that is just six weeks older than Baby Sister, and that we pretty much see every day anyway. I know she's in great and familiar hands. So that helps . . . a little.

Last but not least on the list of ways I am making myself crazy, I keep wondering how the hell I managed to get hired for this job in the first place. I peeked at the faculty bios on the internet, and there were a lot of Ivy League school listed there. Many of the alumni end up at Ivy League schools, there's an Ivy League school across the street, for pete's sake. I have a pretty good idea that if not for the shortage of science teachers they wouldn't have hired a 20-something with less than five years experience and a degree from a state college. (I'm not slamming state colleges here, I swear, I had a wonderful college experience.) I'm feeling slightly overwhelmed. Is there a such thing as slightly overwhelmed?

Anyway, that's enough about that. I feel I should include some knitting in this post, and there has been some knitting. I did finish the second flame hat by the weekend, actually just in time for the boys to go ice fishing with J and Old Friend's husband DM. They had a great time and a snowball fight that lasted hours. They also caught one fish, which they threw back, but that seemed kind of secondary. In other knitting news, I ended up frogging the calorimetry headband. Not because there was anything wrong with it, but because I chopped off most of my hair and it looks kind of odd without a ponytail coming out the back. I'm using the yarn for a more traditional hat. I'm pretty sure the knitting will slow down a bit now, but that's okay.